3/01/2010

Getting Rid of Fear


Fearful thoughts take all the fun out of living. Even if the worst thing we can imagine happens, we will discover we can survive it. Life goes on and we are capable of much more than we know. The what-if disease takes a terrible toll on our happiness.

My favorite remedy for the what-if disease is what I call the horribilization remedy. My rules for horribilization are as follows: First have a fearful thought such as, I have to give a speech in front of all those people. I know I’m going to bomb. We usually obsess over that thought until we’re ready to pass out. To horribilize you have to go even deeper. You think of what-ifs until the very worst thing happens - death. You horriblize to the death conclusion like this, What if I give such a bad speech that everyone thinks I’m stupid and they tell my boss and he fires me and then I can’t buy groceries, starve and die? I guarantee that taking a fearful thought to the death conclusion will always make you laugh at yourself. Besides that, I believe life after death is going to be great so dying isn’t actually all that bad.

When my friend was going through treatment for breast cancer I asked her how she was doing. 
"I'm doing fine," she said. "This treatment is awful but I figure if it doesn't work and I die, I'll be able to be with Pete (her husband who had died unexpectedly at an early age) and if I live I'll be able to be stay here with my children and grandchildren for a few more years.  Either way, I trust that what ever happens is in God's hands, that I'm loved and everything will work our for the best."

A little natural fear is normal; without it we wouldn’t need courage. On the other hand, paralyzing fear is and always will be a fatal disease of the heart for it signals the end of faith. Fear and negativity take up so much room in our heart there is no space for anything else.


I used to have preconceived ideas about how events and people in my life were supposed to turn out. I always worried that things wouldn't work out the way I wanted. Yet life always has a way of teaching us that we are not in charge. The only control we have is how we respond to the the things that happen to us.
Now I choose to wake up, think positive thoughts, do my best that day, learn from what happens then leave the rest in God’s hands. It is amazing how much better I feel.

“Let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong.”(D&C 121: 45)





2 comments:

Ashley Baadsgaard said...

It's true, I think if we took the time to actually think about what it is that's scaring us, we'd realize just how silly we're being. Even our most legitimate fears can be overcome if we have faith. That was a great post. Thanks for sharing!

annette said...

Thank you, for all of your recent posts on changing our thoughts. I've heard it all before, but you have a real practical approach to the subject. Just what I needed to hear. I also really enjoyed watching your interview on KSL and have thought a lot about what you said. I even shared it with my husband and we had a nice discussion on our date last week. Those times with our children are so important and make such a difference.